What is fair? What is luck?

Haihz.. im form4.. i shud be hapi but im not.. coz i've been arranged 2 a class tat DON'T EVEN HAVE A SINGLE FREN OF MINE! im damn damn damn damn damn damn damn damn damn sad... n i cried lots lots lots lots lots lots lots lots of times... D= whn i came bac home, i saw my file n suddenly i rmb-ed all my memories wit my best fren.. even it's jz a crumpled paper we used 2 composed our song, still made my heart full of sadness n tears kip rolling down from my eyes.. n whn i saw da pics of them from my fon (while im sms-ing ), i cant control my damn emotion n my eyes were flooded wit tears agn!

My lil bro is back from skul.. he came n tok 2 me.. i quickly held my tears n lied 2 him tat im having flu.. i managed 2 held it until i bath.. cried alone in da bathroom.. i tot tat i could hide my emotions BUT unfortunately!! my stubborn mum took away my fon n read all my msgs during mid nite!! she knew tat i cried. OH wtf! wateva.. damn moody n gloomy tis few days.. =(

Den, i decided 2 apply 4 chg-ing class.. i wrote da letter n passed it up 2 mdm tee.. it's da same package, so da chance 4 me 2 enter sci1 is very slim.. but i still try my luck.. den, thr were SUM ppl from sci1 wana chg 2 sub, they were my frens.. they asked me nt 2 worry coz i'll definitely transfer 2 sci1.. so, im relieve.. BUT unfortunately!! THEY suddenly chg their minds, they decided nt 2 chg 2 sub.. they took bac da letters from mdm tee.. n i started 2 feel tat thr's sumthing wrong goin on d..

Therefore, my mum forced me 2 gv her mdm tee's number, she asked her 2 let me join sci1.. but guess wad mdm tee said? she said, I'LL DEFINITELY HAD DA CHANCE TO ENTER SCI 1 IF THE PPL HU WANA CHG 2 SUB DIDNT CHG THEIR MINDS! which means i got oni 10% of chance d.. THEY were my frens, im nt gonna b angry at them.

On the other hand, mdm tee oso told my mum tat she wana balance da students from sci 1.. (thr's oni 9 guys in sci 1 now) thr's 2 guys, lets call them guy A n guy B.. guy A had 7a 1b (same as me) get 2 join sci 1! wth?! guy B had 7a 1c OSO get 2 join sci 1! WTF?! TIS IS SO UNFAIR!!! k, u said u wana balance da class, without changing da original list, thr's oni 10 guys in da class! since u cant balance it at da 1st place, y dun u jz gv up n put those hu had better result into da class?!! !@#$%^&*(*()!! ( i told mdm tee like tis on da nex morning)

I went 2 c mdm tee tis morning, jz like wad she asked me 2 do.. she explain n explain n explain..
"Life is like tis, thr's lots of challenge n u hv 2 adapt it.. blablabla.. " shit crap! im so angry by tat time but sadness covered my anger.. n thus, i cried in front of her.. as in sobbing lar, nt cried-out-loud-type.. den thr's 2 seniors came n told me their same experience.. haihz.. wad is tis?! im suppose 2 convince her but nw she's convincing me?!! u stupid fool!

Haihz.. but wad can i do nw? i've 2 adapt tis COMPLETELY new environment.. i dun even tok much wit them, dun even hv da same topics, their world were TOTALLY different from mine! haihz.. i've 2 separate wit my 2 n 3 years frens.. which is reli reli hard 4 me 2 take it.. im sooooooooooooooooooo gonna miss u my buddies!! hope u dun 4get abt me.. ><

The world is so unfair, there's nothing called luck.
Im trying my best.